(We open...in darkness. We hear a few groans, and slowly, the camera finally comes alive...and reveals a shaky image of Sach.)

Sach: (As the shaking continues) Duke? Dukey? Are you in there?

Duke: (He shakes Sach off as the camera returns to normal) Yeah, I'm in here. (Groans and holds his head) Though I wish I wasn't. That was some wine we drank last night!

Danny: *Appears in Duke's vision* It was drugged.

General: (He nods, rubbing his head) I'll believe that.

Charleton: (He looks better than the other two, but worried; shakes a snoring King Josef) We can't awaken the King at all!

General: Hang it all, and the coronation is tomorrow!

Duke: (Narrows his eyes) That Michael guy sent the wine, right?

General: He had it drugged. Dash it, you're right, Mr. Coveletskie. We shouldn't have let the King anywhere near it.

Duke: He probably would have drank it no matter what you told him. He is the king.

Sach: (Looks at Danny) We had an idea.

General: We're all ears.

Sach: (Puts his arms around Danny's shoulders) Danny's a great actor! He's one of the best. He can play the king!

General: Would you be willing to, boy?

Danny: I'm still not so sure it's a GREAT idea...

Sach: Pshaw! It's brilliant.

General: We'll have to teach him all the ins and outs of the coronation.

Danny: But...

Charleton: We'll all be here with you the whole time, telling you what to do.

Danny: But they already drugged him! Who knows what they might try next?

Duke: That's where Sach and I come in. We'll play bodyguards for you and keep an eye out for anything suspicious.

Danny: *Starts to back away* I'm sorry! I can't do this! I can't impersonate a King! I was barely a good jester at Halloween!

Sach: That's not true! You had me in stitches!

Duke: You had yourself in stitches. You were watching "I Love Lucy" and helping Louie slice bread at the same time.

Danny: *Getting close to the door* I can't do this, fellas! I didn't come here to pretend to be the King. I came here to sing and party, then leave!

General: Stop him!

*Danny scrambles for the door!*

Duke: (He and Sach block the door) Danny, think of the country!

Sach: Yeah! Do you want that nasty old Michael to become king?

Danny: No, but...

General: (He joins Duke and Sach) I understand that you're a foreigner here and know little about us. But we have no one else to turn to!

Danny: *Whimpers* Why me?

General: Because you look exactly like the King, dear boy, right down to the smallest detail. We wouldn't even need to fix your hair or shave you.

Danny: *backs into a wall* Oh boy...oh...I'm feeling faint... *He slumps in a faint against the wall and slides down to a sitting position.*

Duke: (Grins at Sach) Ok, I think this is a good indication that it's time to make the change.

Sach: But he said no!

General: (Grins - Charelton is already removing the King's clothes) Once he awakens and sees how devilishly handsome he looks in the King's clothes, I suspect he may change his mind.

*We fade out on the four removing the clothes of the look-a-likes. We fade back in to find one of the red-haired men laying on the couch. His face scrunches, and he whines a little as he comes to. He blinks up at the ceiling, then sits up with a start.*

Danny: *Looking around wildly* I won't do it, I tell ya! I won't... *cuts off as Duke arrives with a half-length mirror; he holds it for him to look into* Oh wow...

*Danny starts inspecting the King's uniform as Duke smirks behind the mirror.*

Danny: You guys are sneaky.

Duke: Thanks.

Sach: You look mahhhvelous!

General: Very debonair.

Danny: *Stands, brushing a sleeve; grins as he looks up* I do look pretty neat, huh? It fits like a glove, too.

Charleton: You look even better than the King!

General: (Nods) We took the King downstairs to the basement. The King's valet Jaques helped us.

Danny: I suppose I could play King for a day... especially if I look this good.

General: Lord Charleton and me will tell you everything you need to know.

Duke: And Sach and me will make sure Michael doesn't try anythin' funny.

Danny: *Nods* Good. *pauses, grinning at himself in the mirror* I wish Kathy could see me.

General: Kathy?

Sach: His woman.

Danny: She'd flip.

Duke: She'd be crazy about you.

Danny: *Still staring at himself in the mirror* I'll do it.

General: Splendid, my boy!

Danny: *Turns from the mirror* So what do I need to know?

General: Everything! You need to have a basic idea of the King's likes and dislikes, what to say to people at the ceremony and ball, and what you're to do at the ceremony.

Danny: Lay it on me, gentlemen.

Duke: (Frowns) I think I hear something at the door. (He opens the door to the living room...and an older woman tumbles out)

General: (His eyes widen) The cook! She heard everything! :P

Cook: (Shakes her head) No! I didn't. I just... (she turns to Danny, her eyes round as saucers) My god! He does look like the King!

Duke: We're gonna have to do something about her.

General: I agree. Woman, can you be trusted not to talk to anyone about this?

Cook: I...I...

Charelton: Maybe we'd better tie her up and leave her here.

General: (Nods and calls) Jaques! (A slight young man appears) Take the Cook to the kitchen and tie her up there. And make sure the King is all right upstairs. (Jaques does so, pulling the horrified Cook away.)

Duke: I hope she can keep her mouth shut.

General: It's a chance we'll have to take. Come on. (He grabs a heavy cloak and drapes it around Danny's shoulders) If anyone asks, we'll say that the King has a cold and must rest until the coronation.

Sach: Yeah! (He holds a handkerchief up to Danny's nose) Let me blow that for you, your highness.

Danny: Sach, I don't HAVE a cold!

Sach: Just makin' sure.

Duke: (Grins at Danny) Come on, your majesty. (Opens the door for Danny) Your carriage awaits.

Danny: I really think I'm gonna like this.

Danny: Onward to the carriage!

(All five men troop out. Cut to a large, dark car driving off into the woods. What they don't see as the roar into the distance is another, smaller red car driving into the spot the other car just vacated. Three figures enter the house. We hear screams and things breaking as we fade out on the hunting lodge.)

(Cut to the streets of a large European city, with narrow thoroughfares and charming wood and stone buildings. They finally ride out of the town and over to what appears to be an old-fashioned castle, complete with a moat and a drawbridge.)

Sach: Wow! (Peers outside) Is there a dragon down there?

General: (Shakes his head) Hardly. The drawbridge doesn't even work. It hasn't been raised and lowered in centuries.

Danny: Wow.

Duke: This is some set-up.

General: The heads of the royal house of Ostrania have lived here since the 1300s.

Sach: Couldn't they find anyplace new?

General: (Nods) There's a far more recent house in the Ostranian countryside where the King spends the summer. It was built in the late 1900s. And of course, there's the hunting lodge.

Danny: Newer, nothing! I love this castle!

Servant: (A younger man joins them; he wears the same maroon garb) Hello, Your Majesty. You're a bit late. The Princess Deborah awaits you and your entourage in the main parlor room. You, her, and your bodyguards will be taking the carriage in the coronation parade, and of course, as your intended, she will be in the coronation as well.

Duke: (Grins) Well, let's get movin', then. Time and Princesses wait for no guy.

Sach: (Mutters to Danny) You're not going to do anythin' crazy like pass out on this dame, are ya? She is a chick.

Danny: *Whispers back* I'm not promising anything.

Servant: Come this way, please. (They follow the servant into the castle.)

(Cut to a small but cozy room tastefully decorated in attractive antiques. A beautiful woman with long, almost white-blond hair and brilliant blue eyes stands in the back of the room, looking out to the gardens in the castle courtyard. She wears a long white gown with a maroon sash like the King's around her shoulders and a maroon ribbon around her waist. She has a tiara and necklace trimmed with garnets.)

Servant: (He bows and waves at the woman) Announcing the Princess Deborah Madeline Felicia Andreas, your Majesty.

(Sach takes one look at Deborah and his lips go crazy. Duke's jaw drops.)

Duke: Uh...uh...uh....

Princess Deborah: What a funny way to say "hello!"

Duke: (Elbows Danny) You're the King. Say somethin' to her!

Princess Deborah: (Curtsies before Danny) Hello again, Your Majesty. We haven't seen each other in years.

Danny: *Bows* Yes, it has been too long.

Princess Deborah: Who are these charming gentlemen? I recognize Lord Charelton and the dear old General, but not the other two.

Sach: Horace DuBussy Jones, but lovely princesses can call me "Sach."

Duke: Stanslaski Coveletske, milady, but you can call me "Duke."

Danny: I thought perhaps I could use a few more guards.

Princess Deborah: Well, they're certainly interesting. (She takes Sach and Danny's arm) Shall we go to our carriage right away? We are the featured attraction in the Coronation Parade.

Danny: Yes, let’s.

Princess Deborah: (As they head for the carriage) Your brother Michael will be riding ahead of us on horseback. (Sighs) I hope everything goes well. I don't trust Michael. The rich and older people of Ostrania favor you, but the young and poor favor Michael.

Danny: We do have very different outlooks on how to rule the country. *shrugs*

Princess Deborah: There are many who truly wish for Michael to rule in your stead.

Danny: That's because Michael says what the people want him to. He doesn't know what's best for the country as a whole. I do.

Deborah: (Smiles) I've often thought the same thing. Michael will say anything that people want to hear, but he's really only out for himself.

Danny: I've known that all my life.

(As they walk around the corner, a tall, dark-haired man with a pencil-thin mustache comes from the opposite side. He's surrounded by several young men and his smirking. He drops the smirk when he sees the group. His outfit is a lighter shade of rust-red than the deep maroon Danny wears, and he has fewer ornaments. He carries a helmet with a white plume instead of a crown.)

Michael: (Slight smirk) Hello, brother. I wish you luck with the coronation ceremony and parade.

Danny: *Short nod* Thank you, Michael.

Michael: (He bows for Deborah and kisses her hand) Deb, you're looking lovelier and more charming than ever.

*Danny's eyes narrow at Michael's attention to Deborah.*

Deborah: (Cooly) Thank you, Michael, but I thought you already had a lady friend. I'd heard about your affair with that woman from England. The Lady...Ariel? Ariana?

Michael: (Makes a face) Annette. That's over.

Danny: That's a shame.

Michael: (Frowns at Danny) You're looking well today, considering you were off making merry at that hunting lodge of yours last night.

Duke: Yeah. We had a good time, too.

Danny: We very much enjoyed your gift. A very nice vintage.

Sach: Tasted great with a little mustard.

Michael: (Narrows his eyes and turns a little red) I'm very glad you enjoyed it. It was, after all, your last night of freedom before officially being crowned king.

Danny: It was extremely thoughtful of you, Michael. My men and I enjoyed it immensely.

General: Perhaps it's time you left for the parade yourself, Michael. You do ride head of us with the military.

Michael: Yes. After all, I've never been one for hiding in cars. I like to be where the people can see me. (He nods at Danny) I'll see you at the coronation ball, brother.

Danny: See you then, Michael.

Michael: (He kisses Deborah's hand again) And I'll see you at the ball as well. We must have the first dance.

Deborah: (Shakes her head) I'm sorry, Michael, but you know that the first dance goes to the King and his intended.

Michael: (Nods) Yes, I'd forgotten. (Bows) I will see you all at the ceremony. (He and his men take off)

Sach: Boy, was he a jerk.

Deborah: He's just rather jealous.

Danny: Jealous nothing.

Duke: There's somethin' funny about that guy...and I don't mean laugh-funny, either. He's hidin' somethin'.

General: I'm inclined to agree with Mr. Coveletske. He was behaving very suspiciously, even for him.

Danny: He had to be expecting more from the drugged wine. I would've thought he'd be disappointed or shocked to see me up and around. I wonder what else is going on?

Lord Charelton: He was missing his usual entourage, too, including his most loyal compatriot, Rupert Fairson of Zilta.

Danny: Very odd.

Deborah: (Frowns) He couldn't mean to harm Josef. If he had, he would have done it already.

Duke: (Raises an eyebrow) Or did he?

Danny: *Eyes widen* And you said Michael was here without his entourage! Where's his entourage now?!

Sach: Yeah! They just don't disappear into thin air!

Deborah: They probably just rode ahead to the parade.

Duke: (Mutters to Danny) We can't discuss this now. We'll talk after the coronation.

Danny: *Nods* Yeah. Later.

Servant #2: (Another servant joins them) The carriage is waiting!

Duke: Well, looks like our ride awaits. (Nods at the door) Well, Sach, do your thing.

Sach: Ok! (He grabs the door and opens it for everyone)

(His lips go as he watches Deborah pass him.)

Sach: Gee, that princess is a real dish.

Danny: *Elbows Sach* Knock it off, Sach.

Sach: (As he follows Danny) Aw, I was only lookin'! I ain't gonna take the King's chick!

Danny: Better not.

(Cut to a long, white limo trimmed with maroon crepe driving through the town. We see a series of cars and carriages, followed by a platoon of men in maroon uniforms on horseback that include General Karlkoff and Prince Michael. Many of the people in peasant outfits cheer as Michael and the milita ride by.)

(The camera moves inside the limo. Sach is leaning out of the limo as far as he can, waving to every pretty girl. Duke tries to drag him back in. Charleton looks a bit embarrassed.)

Danny: *Shakes his head* Sach, must you do an impersonation of a dog?

Sach: (Shrugs) Sorry, Your Majesty, but there's so many pretty girls out there, I just had to say "hi" to all of them!

Danny: And made a spectacle of yourself.

Deborah: I don't see any harm done. I think he's rather sweet...and a very nice advertisement for the coronation.

Sach: (Elbows Danny) See? She likes me!

Danny: Sure.

Deborah: Where did you meet these interesting gentlemen?

Duke: We came into town with a friend for the coronation. He's gonna be playing at the ball.

Danny: *Mutters* Hopefully.

Deborah: (She smiles and takes Danny's hand) You know, there's something different about you today. I can't put it into words. It's like you're not quite yourself.

Danny: *His face flushes a little* I, uh, oh... Do you like it?

Deborah: (Nods) Yes. You're so very charming and gentle, not at all like your usual loud, boisterous self.

Danny: *Smiles, though his face is still flushed* Well, I thought I might try something different. I'm glad you approve.

Deborah: I do approve. I thought...I always thought you weren't very fond of me. You just thought of me as your annoying little cousin, not a woman.

Danny: No, never. I am VERY fond of you.

Deborah: I'm glad. I was always fond of you, ever since we were children and you would pull my pigtails and hide my dolls.

Danny: I only did that because I liked you. *kisses Deborah’s hand* And I still like you.

Duke: (Grins and points out the windows as we hear whistling) Looks like half the town wants you two to get it together.

Older Woman Outside: He's got the red hair!

Older Man: He has the Hapsburg charm, too!

(A younger woman throws Danny a rose.)

Danny: *Picks up the rose and stares at it for a moment, then smiles and offers it to Deborah* For my Queen.

Deborah: (Takes the rose and smells it; smiles at him) Thank you. (She threads it into her sash) I'm looking forward to the coronation now.

Danny: And I'm looking forward to you being there with me.

Duke: (Mutters to Sach) Boy, he's really eatin' this up. He's all over that chick. I think he's forgettin' he ain't even the real king!

Sach: (Nods) Yeah. He's forgotten about Kathy, too. She ain't gonna like that.

Duke: We've gotta think of a way to bring this idiot back to earth without gettin' anyone in any trouble.

Sach: After they stick the crown on his head.

Duke: Never mind crownin' him. If he keeps this up, I think I'm gonna BRAIN him.

Sach: Don't he already have one of those?

(Duke just smacks Sach across the head.)

*Danny puts an arm around Deborah, but he's eyeing Duke and Sach.*

(Sach just shrugs. Duke leans back, rolling his eyes.)

(The camera follows the parade as it winds down to the castle. When we get closer to the castle, the camera cuts to inside. The General and Lord Charelton give Danny last minute instructions while Sach messes with his huge maroon velvet cape and Duke makes sure no one suspicious enters. )

Danny: *slaps at Sach's hand* Quit playing with my cape already! It's fine!

Sach: It ain't layin' right!

Danny: And how do you know how it's supposed to lay?

Charelton: I agree with him. It's fine, Mr. Jones.

Sach: Because I'm a great clothes designer! (Indicates his own rented tuxedo) Don't I look dashin'?

Danny: I'm not answering that.

General: (As the music begins) They're ready to begin. Danny, we'll be with you at all times.

Sach: Yeah. Just lean on me, and you won't faint.

Danny: *Gives Sach a curious look* Who says I'm going to faint? *turns to the General* I'm ready.

General: All right, my boy. We go first. Then you. Mr. Coveletske and Mr. Jones will follow you to make sure there's no mishaps.

Danny: *Grins* Lets go.

(Cut to the main throne room. It's a larger version of the throne room set seen in several fairy tale and action stories. Music plays over a long procession that begins with a smirking Michael and ends with Danny, Duke, and Sach. Sach still waves to everyone he can, especially lovely ladies.)

(When they arrive at the thrones, a man in bishop's robes and Deborah are there. Deborah puts a larger sash with a gold medallion on it around Danny's shoulders and kisses his forehead. The bishop makes a speech that we can't hear over the music but appears to be boring. Michael rolls his eyes and Duke yawns.)

*Danny listens intently, though he continuously steals glances at Deborah.*

Archbishop: (As the music swells) And I here-by proclaim Josef Hapsburg of Zarinda to be the King of all Ostrania! Long Live the king! (He places the large gold and maroon velvet crown firmly on Danny's head)

*Danny grins widely, then takes Deborah in his arms and kisses her.*

(We fade out on the two in each other's arms as Duke grins, Sach whistles, Michael scowls, the Archbishop beams knowingly, and the rest of the room cheers.)