(Fade in on what appears to be backstage at the same theater where "Bowery Boys Get a Clue" was set. Danny and the five Bowery Boys make their way to the wings as stagehands bustle around them.)

Sach: Oh boy, oh boy! Show business! Betty Hutton was right. There ain't no business like it.

Butch: Sure is busy here. (Looks at Slip) Are you sure you're ok? You did pass out when you were on Gabe's show.

Slip: I'm fine. *mutters* For now.

Sach: (Puts his arm around Slip) Don't worry, Chiefy, I'll hold you up!

Slip: Sach...

Assistant: (A man in glasses and a suit rushes up to the boys) You're on in 10 minutes! Do you have your script?

Slip: We know what we're doin'.

Slip: C'mon, fellas, let’s get in our places.

Assistant: Very well. Take your places, boys!

Sach: We're on! Come on, Chiefy, let's go be stars!

Slip: Oh, we're gonna be stars. *smirks when he sees Rex and Leslie* An' those two'll be seein' stars.

Rex: (He smirks) Hello, boys. Ready to be on TV?

Slip: We're ready.

Rex: You know what to do. Stand on your cues and repeat your lines. Then my boys will come out, and we'll demonstrate how effective my diet and exercise methods are.

Slip: Yeah, yeah, we got it.

Rex: Good. See that there's no slip-ups. I don't want any of you making a mess of this. Or else.

Sach: Or else what?

Rex: Or else you get your faces re-arranged to look even worse than they already do.

Sach: I don't think that's possible with Chiefy.

*Slip gives Sach a glare.*

Assistant: You're on, boys!

Rex: Right. (He puffs out his chest even further - if that's possible - and struts onto the stage.)

Danny: *Whispers* Boy, I'd sure like to deflate that guy.

Slip: *Whispers back* Ya just might get the chance, Dan.

Sach: Well, come on! Let's go show that guy what we're made of!

(Cut to onstage. It's a simple, very 50s living room set. A young woman in a pretty turquoise dress and an older man in an elegant blue suit sit on the couches together.)

Woman: (She quickly smiles as the camera turns to her) Welcome back to "Good Morning New York," with your hosts Regina Phillis...

Man: ...And Karl Lester! And here with us today are the owners of that new gym in the Bowery everyone's talking about. I know I've been interested, and I'm sure you have two, Reg. Here are Rex Hamilton and Leslie DiLuccio!

Rex: (He comes out flexing his muscles; we hear several women in the audience gasp and swoon; even Regina grins dreamily) Hello, everyone. As you can see, we at the Hercules Gym, we take working out very seriously.

Regina: (Sighs) No kidding.

Rex: In fact, Miss DiLuccio and I want to give you a demonstration of just what a week on the Hercules Gym diet and exercise program can do for you! (Calls to the wings) Ok boys, you can come out now!

(But no one comes out.)

Rex: (Smiles sheepishly for the camera) They were there a minute ago! You know these weaklings. Not too bright.

(Karl makes a face and rubs his own not-exactly-shapely arms.)

*Danny comes out in shorts and a sleeveless shirt, flexing his muscle-less arms and grinning.*

Sach: Here comes Atlas Jones, the Greatest Muscle Man in the world! (Sach comes out in a 20s-style men's bathing suit with the tank top and very obvious inflatable biceps.)

Regina: (She puts a hand over her mouth to stiffle her giggles; Karl grins) Very interesting.

*Whitey swings through, hollering like a warbled Tarzan.*

Rex: (Looks up) Hey, who let him up there?

Karl: I don't know, but I want to do that next.

(Butch and Chuck come in next. Chuck is on Butch's shoulders.)

*And Chuck is juggling oranges.*

Butch: Ta da!

*Slip arrives shirtless, but still wears his hat and slacks. He stands next to Rex, smirking ever so slightly.*

Rex: (Growls under his breath) What are you doing? This is a commercial, not a circus!

Slip: *mutters* I thought this was a commercial FOR a circus, ya muscle-head.

Regina: If this is the "before," the after has to be a scream!

Sach: Yeah! They're even bigger!

Rex: (Mutters to Leslie) Get the guys and get them to get these morons off-stage!

*Leslie nods and heads off-stage.*

Karl: (He grins at Slip) I like your ensemble, especially the hat.

Slip: Thanks. *nods at Karl* Yer pretty sharp yerself.

Karl: Thanks! So, how did you guys get such a great sense of humor? If you have this much fun working out at this place, I might almost consider it.

Slip: That's cuz the gym is a joke. We don't go there cuz-a these muscle-bound morons.

Karl: (Raises an eyebrow; mutters to him) Speaking of, here comes a few more.

Rex: (As four men in shorts and nothing else come out, flexing their huge muscles) And here's the REAL benefits of the Hercules Gym diet and exercise program!

Slip: *Yells* ROUTINE FOUR!

(Suddenly, everyone jumps on everyone else! Sach ducks out of the way. He steps in front of Rex and continues to model his false biceps.)

Regina: (Her eyes widen) Um... (she turns to the cameras) Cue the commercial!

*The guys fight in their usual frenzy, though there's more ducking involved as the guys outsmart instead of out-punch the muscle men. At one point, Danny sneaks over and pops Sach's fake muscles. He moves in front of him and poses.*

(Sach jumps in front of HIM.)

*Danny crawls between Sach's legs and gets in front of him.*

(Sach shoves at Danny and gets in front of him again, blocking his face with his skinny arms...as well as he can.)

*Danny turns his pose at Sach.*

(Rex shoves them BOTH into the couch and jumps in front of the audience to pose.)

*We see Slip come back in with his shirt on. He’s followed by policemen.*

Rex: Officers, these men have made a mockery of my commercial!

Regina: And we can't stay in commercials forever. Taffy the Dancing Cigarette Box will pass out again.

Officer Murphy: (Takes Rex's arm) Sorry, laddie. These good gentlemen called us earlier and told us everythin' that you've been up to in that gym of yours...and even before that. (He turns to Regina) Lassie, you need to screen your guests better. These two have a list of infractions as long as this theater.

Karl: (Mutters) I knew someone with muscles like that couldn't be for real.

Officer Murphy: (As the other officer takes Leslie's arm...and eyes her comely body) We already have a warrant to search your office and the gym. It looks like the two of you may be doin' a very different kind of body buildin' for a long time. (The cops lead the protesting Rex away)

Regina: (Throws her arms up in the air) Great! Now we don't have a guest!

Karl: (Turns to Slip) How about you guys? I think I like you.

Slip: Us?

Danny: Oh, can we?

Sach: Yeah! Oh boy, we're REALLY gonna be on TV!

Regina: We don't have a choice. We can't get another guest in less than two seconds.

Assistant: (Walks across the stage) They're carrying Taffy to the dressing room. You guys are on!

(The curtains open, revealing everyone where they are. Regina immediately turns to the camera and smiles.)

Regina: Welcome back! Sorry about that long interruption. We had to take care of a few things onstage.

Karl: (Can't help his smirk) It seems that our gym was nothing more than a fraud set up to trick skinny guys.

Regina: (Makes a face at Karl, then turns to the Boys) We still have these wonderful gentlemen. We’ve already seen that they can put on quite a show. What's your name, boys?

Butch: I'm Butch.

Chuck: I'm Chuck.

Sach: I am Horace DuBussy Jones, but my friends call me Sach... (turns to the audience) and you're all my friends.

Whitey: *Waves* Whitey here!

Danny: I'm Danny.

*Slip has disappeared.*

Karl: Where did the other guy go?

Sach: Oh, Chiefy doesn't like being on TV. He gets kinda woozy.

Karl: He seemed ok when I talked to him.

Danny: *His eyes widen; he beams* Butch! Look, they got a piano! *points off to the side* Wanna play? I'll sing!

Butch: Sure! (He turns to Karl and Regina) I'm a really good piano player. I played everywhere when I was a kid.

Regina: (She smiles) Go right ahead, son. (Mutters to Butch) We need to fill air time.

Butch: (Whispers back) Gotcha. (He sits at the piano.) Any requests, Dan?

Danny: How about "Life Could Not Better Be?"

Butch: (Grins) Sure! I think that's perfect for right now.

(Sach is still showing off his non-existent muscles for the audience.)

*Chuck takes a seat on the couch, but not without looking behind it first. His eyes widen. He grins, then waves Whitey over. Whitey looks behind the couch and laughs. The camera moves to reveal a pair of feet protruding from behind the couch.*

Whitey: Should we move him?

Chuck: Nah. Slip can sleep it off back there.

*We fade out as Chuck and Whitey grin, Sach shows off his non-existent muscles, Butch plays the piano, and Danny sings.*