(We open with the guys in a limo pulling up to an enormous house. Sach wears the fanciest tux he can rent, including a top hat. Duke's navy tux is simpler. Butch wears a white tux.)

*Chuck wears a simple black tux. Danny's tux is purple, including a matching hat.*

Sach: Oooh, isn't this exciting? A real ball at the Draconian embassy! I can't wait to meet all those Draconian women!

Butch: Sach, we're not here to chase chicks. We're here to find out where they stashed the real Mark Keller.

Sach: I know, Butch, but...can't we just look at one or two girls?

Butch: I don't think that's a good idea. We have to find those spies, right Duke?

Duke: Right. That's the only reason we're even here.

Sach: (As they pull up in front of the ballroom) Oooh wow! Now this is where they hold a party. (Turns to Chuck) I'll bet you could write about this for the paper, too.

Chuck: I'll try to.

(A man opens the door for them after they stop. They all look around, their eyes wide.)

Sach: Wow! Look at that! (He sees several young ladies walk by him) Look at THAT. Dukey...er, Marky...are you sure we can't chase one girl?

Duke: For the last time, Sach, no! We're on a mission here.

Sach: Awwww!

Butler: (Turns to the men) May I take your hats and jackets, gentlemen? (He smiles on seeing Duke) Ahh, Commander. I thought you had disappeared. I see the news reports were grossly exaggerated.

Sach: But I like my hat! (Holds onto it)

Butch: (Gives the man his coat) I think he just wants to hold onto them for us.

Duke: Yes, the reports were exaggerated.

Butler: I'm very glad to hear that. (Nods) And so will Ambassador Willeski, Prime Minister Morrika, and Lady Du Vane. The Prime Minister is representing Draconia here, and I'm sure he would like to speak with you.

Duke: Oh, well, certainly.

Butler: (Turns to the crowd, announcing) Commander Mark Keller and company!

Ambassador Willeski: (He's a small, round middle-aged man with the touch of Eastern Europe about him; he wears a fancy tux with a wide sash across the front. With him are a tall blond woman in a bell-skirted red gown with a plunging neckline and a somewhat younger man who wears a tux similar to the Ambassador's; his eyes are wide) Why, Commander Keller, I did not expect to see you here! They said you were kidnapped! Beastly business!

Duke: Ah, it was a mere exaggeration.

Lady Du Vane: (Frowns, but then purrs and gets very close to Duke) I don't know who could have started such rumors. Who could ever kidnap someone so strong and handsome as you?

Sach: Are we talking about the same Dukey here?

Duke: *Clears his throat* I don't know who started it.

Lady Du Vane: I'm glad they were exaggerated. (She leans a bit closer) We could have a lot of fun together, Commander.

Duke: I suppose we could...

Lady Du Vane: Maybe we could go out on the terrace together and have a drink? Chat old time?

Duke: I don't know. I felt a touch of a cold coming on, and I don't want to tempt fate...

Ambassador Willeki: (Mutters to Lady Du Vane) How did he get loose? I thought our men had him!

Lady Du Vane: (Mutters back) I don't know. I do know that he's here now. I want to find out how he escaped. You keep the rest of these idiots busy.

Ambassador Willeki: (Frowns as Prime Minster Morrika chats with Sach; he slaps him on the back, making him lose his eyeglass...and then step on it) Lucky me.

Lady Du Vane: (Turns to Duke) Come now, Commander. Surely you'd like to relive a few cherished memories. (Sighs) When I think of the time we spent walking along the Seine in Paris...

Butch: (He and Chuck join Duke; whispers to him) Duke, I don't trust this chick.

Duke: *Whispers back* I don't, either.

Chuck: *Whispers* If you go and something happens, we'll know who's involved. Besides, we'll be right here waiting.

Butch: Yeah! I don't think this guy will be able to handle Sach for much longer without killing him.

Duke: *Nods* I'll go. *turns to Lady Du Vane; normally, and reaches out a hand* Shall we go?

Lady Du Vane: (Takes his arm) Yes. Let's do that.

Sach: (He slaps the Prime Minster on the back) And I've got a MILLION of them, Primey! (The poor man lands smack on the floor...and out of the camera's range. Sach looks a little embarrassed) Oop! I hope I didn't break the poor guy's nose. Um, he ain't movin'. Medic!

Butch: (He grabs Sach's arm) We'd better get out of here, before the Prime Minister comes to.

Sach: Hey, where did Dukey go?

Chuck: With the Lady, hopefully to find out something about the real Commander.

Sach: Aww! I usually get the chick who wants to chase us! (Grins) Can we watch?

Chuck: Sach...

Butch: Actually, I like that idea. We'll be able to keep an eye on Duke that way.

Sach: See? I get good ideas sometimes!

Butch: Hey, where's Danny?

Chuck: Oh no. *motions toward the stage area* Look.

*Sure enough, Danny's found his way to the stage. He's chatting with the band leader.*

Sach: Good ol' Dan. He always finds a way to sing somethin'.

Butch: Maybe we'd better leave him there. He might get one of his panic attacks while we're doing this.

Chuck: I'm inclined to agree.

Butch: Come on, then!

(Cut to the terrace, which is a moonlit balcony. Lady Du Vane hands Duke a glass of wine and takes hers.)

Lady Du Vane: (Smiles and lifts her glass) Shall we have a toast, darling? To us...and to you and your new design.

Duke: *Nods, raising his glass* Certainly, my dear.

Lady Du Vane: As an old friend, I'd like to know all about your design. It sounds wonderful. Will it really have a jet engine and a radar capable of finding even the smallest pin on the ground?

Duke: It certainly will have all of that, and more.

Lady Du Vane: Can't you tell me anything about that more? (She runs her finger over his collar) For old times' sake.

Duke: Oh, but I've been sworn to secrecy until it's time to reveal. As for the exaggerated kidnapping of myself earlier, maybe you have some thoughts on who?

Lady Du Vane: Not I, of course. (Sighs) But I know there are assassins and desperate men all over the Embassy who would love to see you dead.

Duke: "All over?"

Lady Du Vane: (She leans closer to him) I'll protect you. I'm an excellent shot, and quite skilled with knives as well.

Duke: *Nods* Good to hear.

Man #1: (Two men in tuxes step onto the terrace) Ok, you two. Hands on your heads.

Lady Du Vane: What's the meaning of this?

Man #1: Come on, sister. (He pulls out a gun) You heard me. You're both comin' with us.

Lady Du Vane: We'll do no such thing!

Man #1: Our bosses want his airplane design.

Lady Du Vane: Get out, you two!

Man #1: (As the second man grabs Duke's arms) You're both comin' with us. We've got a couple of buddies waiting outside who would love to talk to him.

Man #2: Yeah! (He yanks Duke's arm behind his back)

Duke: *Grunts* Watch it, buddy.

Man #2: (He looks like he's trying to remember what to say; Lady Du Vane discreetly kicks his shin) Oh, yeah! You're, uh, comin' with us! Yeah, that's it! You're gonna do a lot of talkin'! We wanna know about your big, fancy airplane!

Lady Du Vane: (As the other man handles her) NO!

Sach: (Suddenly, the three guys spring into the room) ROUTINE FIVE! (Butch literally jumps on the back of the man holding Lady Du Vane.)

*Duke spins and flips the guy holding his arm over his shoulder. Chuck clips the other man's chin with his fist.*

Lady Du Vane: (Makes a face) What are all of you doing here?

Sach: Savin' your bacon, Lady! (He looks down at her tight dress) And boy, do you have some nice bacon!

*Chuck slaps the back of Sach's head.*

Sach: You're just jealous. You didn't see her first!

Chuck: *Mutters* I have a girl. This one might be trouble.

Sach: Well, I don't have a girl...and how much trouble could one girl be, anyway?

Chuck: You don't really want me to answer that, do you?

Sach: No.

(The man throws Butch off of him. He lands on Chuck and Sach and knocks all three of them over.)

Sach: (As Duke runs over to them) Oop! I think that's the signal to get outta here!

Butch: (Rubs his back) No kidding.

Chuck: C'mon, fellas!

Lady Du Vane: But... (The boys hurry out. She follows them.)

(Cut to the ballroom. The Ambassador comes up to Duke.)

Ambassador Willeki: There you are, Commander. I would really like to ask you about your plane designs. I want to know if they're up for sale.

Duke: No, sir, I'm afraid they aren't for sale. I must be leaving quickly. Pressing business, you know.

Ambassador Willeki: Ahh, with the Lady Du Vane, I assume. (Elbows Duke in what he assumes to be a playful way) She is quite a...what do you Americans say...plate, yes?

Duke: Dish, sir. The word is dish. I really must be going...

Ambassador Willieki: (As the other boys dart by) We'll discuss this later (Sach grabs Duke) over tea and crumpets (the men run by him, almost knocking him over) at my suite!

Sach: Oop! (Points to the men) Dukey, those guys are still after us!

Butch: What are we going to do? We can't call a routine with all these people around!

Sach: (He goes to the buffet table) Dukey, can we have something to eat? I'm starved!

Butch: (Points to the men; Lady Du Vane is looking for them, too) Here they come!

Duke: I've got an idea. Sach wants to eat. We need a distraction. Lets fling some food, fellas.

Sach: Now that's my kind of distraction! (He grabs a pie, pulls out a slice of the pie...and then starts in on the rest of the pie)

Butch: All right. I'm going to tell the Ambassador and the security guards about those men, too.

(Butch goes over to a guard as Sach, Chuck, and Duke start throwing food at the two men. Sach eats every other slice of cake.)

Lady Du Vane: What's going...eeek! (Sach wasn't looking where he was throwing and has hit her with a pie! It lands smack in her face.)

Sach: Oop! I didn't mean to do that! (Sighs) I love a woman who still looks gorgeous, even with whipped cream on her face.

*Duke throws a bowl of salad at one of the men, then punches him. Chuck grabs a bottle of seltzer and sprays it in the face of another man.*

(Sach just throws cake and pastries every which way, not caring whom he hits. We briefly cut to the Prime Minister wiping icing from his glasses where he was hit.)

Sach: (To Slip as he throws a cake) Dukey, this is fun! Can we do this more often?

Duke: At the next embassy ball we're invited to.

Butch: (He and Danny bring the guards over) Here you go, sir!

Prime Minister Morrika: What's going on...whoops! (He slips on a cake on the floor and winds up smack on his back again.)

Sach: Oop! Sorry, sir. We're just bringin' these criminals down!

Ambassador Willeki: (As the guards handcuff the two men) What's the meaning of this, Commander Keller?

Sach: Those guys tried to hurt our friend D...uh, Mr. Keller!

Duke: These men were trying to kidnap me.

Butch: (Nods) Yeah! We found them trying to strong-arm Lady Du Vane and Commander Keller.

Lady Du Vane: (Nods) They're right. I can confirm everything.

Ambassador Willeki: Take these bad men away! (The guards do just that. Willeki turns to Duke) I'm very sorry, Commander. Forgive such an injustice being done in these walls.

Duke: Thank you, sir.

Ambassador Willeki: I'd like to make it up to you. Why don't you and your friends visit us tomorrow for tea?

Sach: But I hate tea!

Ambassador Willeki: That is all right, young man. There will be other drinks as well.

Prime Minister Morrika: (As Lady Du Vane helps him to his feet) I'm not sure that is a good idea.

Willieki: I'm sure it'll be fine. What do you say, Commander? Do you have a free late morning?

Sach: We're free every mornin'!

Butch: (Mutters to Duke) It might give us a chance to question these people further.

Duke: *Nods* We would appreciate that, Ambassador, thank you. Whenever you're available is fine with us.

Willeki: We'll have tea and hot cocoa and discuss that plane design. Perhaps we can even go see your plane?

Sach: I don't know if we can do that. That plane is, uh, really busy.

Lady Du Vane: How can a plane be busy? (She snuggles against Duke) It's only busy when someone fine and handsome is driving it.

Duke: Oh, but it is busy...uh, being fitted with some new gear. I'm afraid it's unavailable for a few days.

Willeki: What a shame!

Morrika: I, for one, would like to see it as soon as it's finished.

Lady Du Vane: Maybe you and I can go up in it sometime soon, Commander.

Duke: Certainly.

Sach: No way, Lady! I get dibs on the shotgun seat!

*Chuck elbows Sach.*

Lady Du Vane: (Makes a face) Very well. (She turns to Duke) I'll see you tomorrow, Commander. (She leans over him) And perhaps we can meet in my room and continue what we were doing on the terrace.

Duke: Perhaps.

Willeki: (As the boys leave; turns to Lady Du Vane) Did you find out how he managed to escape...or about the plane designs?

Lady Du Vane: No, he wouldn't give up any information. I have a feeling those...boys...may have been how he got free.

Willeki: So do I.

Morrekia: We'll have to make sure someone keeps an eye on them when they're here tomorrow.

Willeki: And if we can't get to them (smirks at Lady Du Vane) that's where you come in, my dear. You did once know our Commander.

Lady Du Vane: And I'd be more than happy to know him again.

Morrekia: We have to get those plans! We could use them for our own Air Force.

Willeki: And we will, Morrekia. We just have to find a way to keep those other men from interfering again.

Morrekia: And I need to talk to the men who grabbed him in the first place.

Lady Du Vane: And remind them that they don't get paid unless they do the job completely.

Morrekia: I'll handle them if you two and the men here deal with those other idiots.

Willeki: With pleasure.

Lady Du Vane: I think I would enjoy seeing that. Perhaps I can do something with the one with the broken profile...

Willeki: I wish you luck. That one is the worst of the lot. Not to mention the hungriest. He ate anything from the buffet that he didn't throw.

Morrekia: We'd better go prepare the men for tomorrow, just in case they decide to have another food fight like this one.

Willeki: Right. (We fade out as they head for the crowds)